I have completely lost my way. I don't quite know when it happened and I have no idea why but I have suddenly lost all faith in my writing and my ability. Nothing triggered it. Well, nothing I am aware of anyway. I just suddenly one day a few weeks ago thought 'Why are you doing this? You can't write anything good so why bother?'
So I slunk away and didn't say anything. I haven't written anything and I haven't read any of my WIP. I haven't been on Twitter much and I haven't been checking in. I just don't quite know what to do.
I have been reading so my goal of Read as much as possible aiming for at least TWO books a week is still kind of in play. I have read 27 books this year so behind schedule for my 100 books this year goal but there is still time. For now I might just go with that. I need to find a way forward because I do want to write. I just have a block. And not writer's block. Just a block.
When Lauren asked me if I was still alive today on Twitter I figured I better say something. I'll find my way, I'm sure. I just maybe need some time.
I hope you are all going strong and smashing your goals. I hope to check-in again with a bit more focus and direction. But for now, I'll continue reading.
Ouch Em. I know (I bet we all know) what your disillusion feels like. Crap! But you know what? It won't last. Give yourself time-out. Then come back in a month and don't read your WIP as finished novel, but as a pencil sketch on a canvas awaiting the colourful strokes. If thats not working, put it away and start writing an alternative end to a book you loved, or a movie. Or write a few flash fiction pieces, working on tightening up the word count. All these things motivate me, when the WIP only breaks my heart. I eventually get back on it again, but it's never until the ninth edit and after the editors been at it till I feel less crappy about my abilities. Even now, I' want to change things and it's published! Don't allow perfectionism to cloud your judgement. You'll get through it. Till then, enjoy the reading.
ReplyDeleteShah
shahwharton.com
You'll turn it around when you're ready, Em. Just remember, every writer has to start at the beginning and learn the ropes. Have I told you my first novel just sits in a drawer, possibly damaged beyond repair by my ineptitude at the time? I learned from my early mistakes, and you will, too. It takes a lot of work, and you're staring at lots more work after having come so far….it's overwhelming. One step at a time. And we're with you. :)
ReplyDeleteAww sweetie, I'm sorry to hear that... But I'm glad you decided to check-in and share your doubts with us. That's what we're here for! I think if you keep reading and if you don't put too much pressure on yourself, the desire to write will come back, slowly but surely. Maybe try fan-fiction as Lauren suggested? Hope you have a great week! All the hugs :)
ReplyDeleteIsn't it great to be part of a network of people who "get it"? Just let us know if there's anything we can do to encourage you. If you need time, that's OK. If you need us to give you a little push...we can do that too. Enjoy your reading. All the best in all your endeavours.
ReplyDeleteEm! Oh... Em.... <<<>>>
ReplyDeleteSeriously, these writing blues are...well, they suck. We all get them at least once or ten times, and they suck, they totally outright suck.
But they do go away too. You'll read something that inspires you, or see something that you want to make a note about to remember later and suddenly you'll find you're writing several paragraphs....
My suggestion... write something. Just something small. Do a flash fiction or two. Or my Five Sentences thingie I've been doing. Keep your hand in, but don't feel any of it needs to be kept. Tell yourself you are playing with words, doodling with prose...
A good reader has so many great tools to draw on for writing but one huge handicap... the inevitable emotional comparisons. Don't compare yourself to other writer's. Or if you do, remember that for a lot of those people, that "first book" is often the 10th they wrote.
Will be thinking of you.
Gah! Gaaaahhh! Oh, I know what you mean. Which is why my guest post on Kait Nolan's blog toward the beginning of the month was about not giving up just because where you're at is not where you want to be.
ReplyDeleteI wonder: what would happen if you let somebody read your WIP? You'd have to pick the right reader, of course. One who is not prone to being a negative Nelly. (Poor Nelly. She gets such a bad rep!) But sometimes when I'm stuck on a piece and sick to death of it or feeling generally down about my writing, it helps me to get someone else's perspective. What do you think?